The DAY!!

Ok, this will be my last blog about the wedding. 

It seems like so much has happened and yet nothing have changed. I guess in a way, that much is a comfort. 

I think to tell the whole story of it, I shall have to start about 3 days before my actual wedding day. After a scare from some fortune teller, we managed to negotiate a peace treaty by having another ceremony 3 days before our actual wedding day. Additional ceremony means more work and more work means less sleep. At first, we negotiated a very small and private ceremony. I thought I could make do with my own make up and maybe a simple white dress and that will be it, so I wasn't too happy when I find myself scrambling to find a last minute make up artist and a white wedding gown. 

My before and after look before my actual wedding day

Granted that I wasn't able to test her make up, it was still alright but I still prefer the stylist that we invited from KL. Simply a blessing. 

On the actual day itself, woke up early to make up and dress up. Last minute also can tweet about it and check my phone... hehe... 

And then around 9ish, the groom and his gang came along. Luckily I have my stylist, Jossi with me or else I swear I wouldn't be able to sit still. I can hear people laughing and jostling around downstair but I cannot see a thing until one of my friend showed me a short video. 

You know it would be great fun when the dessert for the man looks something like this. And this is not even the hottest of 'em all. 

Guaranteed 'bagus'!

I wish I could give better details about what happened downstairs with the groom and his gang while I fidget upstairs but I am not sure, so if anyone else blogs about it, I would link it here. 

(O ya, forgot to mention. The actual photographer was found and assigned last minute. It almost gave me a heart attack. Thank God he is a funny and professional photographer!)

(So thankful I am for having him last minute that I won't mind him throwing my shoes up the jambu tree!) 

I am so thankful for my sisters as the trio busied themselves with controlling the crowd, managing the bridesmaids and cooking up hell on earth. (I heard it didn't turn out to be hell, it seems the groom and his gang could stomach much worst... damn!!) 

As night draws near, we took a nap (and I regretted it, should have done something else) before the dinner. As I soon learn, my list were slightly incomplete because I fell asleep the night before (at 3am, ok?) and didn't remember to complete it. So, once again... grateful to my sis who helped me manage and control the throng of crowd. If anyone is offended, my apologies. I didn't mean to offend, I just truly and wholly wanted to sleep, that's all.

But overall, I think it turned out OK!!

I realized that I have bunch of awesome friends who readily forgives the mishaps. Initially I have thought of staging my own version of runaway bride but I was glad I didn't, because then I won't have been the reason for all my friends to have a gathering in that place. 

The night really felt like a blur and even right now, I struggled to recall how many tables we toasted and how many courses we have in our dinner menu. 

My stylist for the day, Jossi. 

The ones I will recall ultimately are the ones who stick by me, even for the smallest task like finding the right dress (ok, that is not small... that is like a HUGE task!) or even the right make up. Those who came from far for me and who put on a smile through the chaos (ok la, not that bad la) and confusion, thank you! 

The confession of a bridezilla

My gosh, I feel so relieved that I will only have one wedding throughout my entire life. 

It seems like my years of events management, conflict resolution and anger management has been put to THE test all in one bundle for one single event. 

Ok, not that bad la...

I guess every single girl have this image of the ideal wedding in their mind. (I wonder who planted it in our mind. Perhaps the works of the same bunch of people who had also cashed in on commercializing events like Christmas or Easter.) But now I know for fact that every single person have this image of the ideal wedding and they will ensure that you know about it one way or another.

So, wedding prep started off pretty easy, I think. I had the leisure of doing things slowly like choosing the musics, the wedding favors and thinking of who to invite to my wedding. I was getting the hang of calling companies up and getting quotation and thinking of where and what of the wedding.

I had this sweet idea of giving personalized fortune cookie within cute double-happiness boxes as wedding favors. I was so happy with it that I was feeling quite confident that everything would turn out fine.

I created an event in FB and waited as friends and family members leave messages on whether they would come or not. I thought whoever didn't reply my messages wouldn't actually bothered to come so I confidently reported the numbers and we confirmed the number of tables with the hotel.

I had the fright of my life when suddenly people who didn't confirm suddenly told me they were coming. Don't get me wrong, I am touched but I was a bit frantic at that point that my list was a bit messy. (Perhaps more annoyed is the fact that people who told me they were coming didn't bothered to and I see empty tables, it breaks my heart. Y u no say u no come? )

Then a fortnight into our wedding, a chinese fortune teller told us (based on a book) that our wedding date isn't auspicious and if we stick to that date, our marriage would break and/or my womb would grow spiderweb (if you get what I mean). I was upset and close to tears as I imagined the horrors and pain of changing plan at such a short period of time. At the same time, I was enraged as I couldn't for the life of me understand what did he based his readings on as he didn't even bothered to get our birth dates. Tell me, is that normal?!?

In the end, I managed to negotiate a separate and smaller event on another auspicious date so on our pre-determined wedding date, we could still have our wedding banquet and the game ceremony in the morning. Everyone was still shaky of the scare and tried to talk me out of the game ceremony and all that on our pre-determined-now-cursed date (technically, that day is my birthday too. So, wtf??ｏ( ><)o My birthday is cursed??), I was so upset that I made hubby promised that if one day my womb grow spiderweb he will still love me. Thank God, he said the right words. lol... Or I would have staged my own version of run away bride.

As the date has now been pulled forward, I had to speed up my preparation and what not. Step one on the list was cleaning out my old family house. It has been left unattended for quite some time and the dust layer was so amazing that I had skin eczema the first day I tried to clear my stuff away.

 I think the construction opposite my house didn't help too. It was so horrible I managed to hire a maid to clean it for one day and poor girl sneezed the first few hours, I felt so bad. Luckily for me too, my sisters came back few days afterwards and help cleaned it some more.

The second thing on my list would be the traditional decors! I had such a hard time making peace with purchasing stuff I didn't like for a one time event that I can't throw away or reuse afterwards. For example, according to tradition, the bride has to bring chicken into the groom's house during the wedding day. The tradition has now changed to allow us to bring the chicken statue instead. Honestly, I don't see any improvement at all about this. Imagine paying RM160+ for statue of chicken that cannot be eaten (I think live chicken cheaper some more!)  and according to the shopkeeper I cannot throw away and I cannot let anyone reuse it (consumerism at its best). In order to make me listen, she had thrown in the scare of spiderweb-laden-womb for safety measure. (Me shaking my fist at her (＃｀д´)ﾉ )

The other thing that a bride needs to bring over is a set of new toiletries, which includes the face towels, towel set, face basin and the omg-so-ugly urinal pot. I'd hate to interject at this point that I live elsewhere and I would never (in any right mind) bring these things to my place and paying RM300+ for set of reddish colour toiletries is probably big sign someone is ripping me off. When the shop assistant pulled out the baby bathtub, I was at my limit and while no one else was looking, I rudely waved her away.

It is totally against my principle to buy stuff I know I would never use, even the thought of letting other people use or giving it away was quickly hushed by elders that I felt like a sucker consumer being sucked into mindless tradition. I believe that in olden days people are poorer and not everyone would be able to afford new set of toiletries for each newly weds, right? It would have probably been borrowed or passed down, right? So tell me, can anyone even traced the belief that you can't pass on or borrow these stuff?? I totally believe these are mainly stuff the shopkeeper made up to ensure continuous business.

Then the wedding dress hunt! Everyone assured me that it would be easy for me to find the right dress that I actually confidently pushed it to a month before my wedding. Since I took a bridal package from a bridal studio as well, the owner told me not to choose the dress too early because he would have a new batch of wedding dress by a few months time. So I was disappointed to find not only limited wedding dress but also dresses that were obviously worn old.

I think I might have tried on 20-25 gowns before we finally decided on a white gown and a dinner gown. We eventually hunted outside of the bridal studio we had a contract with and had to pay extra. Luckily my sisters were closed by, because I would totally have decided to wear the ugly dresses and just forget this day ever existed. Luckily, they also allowed us to take pic of the gown so we could have more time festering on which gown looked better. But it is really a strenuous time if you leave it to the last month especially when everything else is also threatening to change.

Preparation was hell I have to admit and there were nights I couldn't get enough sleep and I grew restless, cranky and lost my appetite. It didn't help that everyone was pouring in and pushing their opinion over, I want to thank you all for trying to help. I can now say that I see that elders want us to follow certain traditions because they want the best for us ( and not have spider-web womb, wtf!). I hope you know that I may not agree, but I do it for your peace of mind. And I can also comprehend that something uttered were mainly because they wanted me to have a memorable wedding... and I know you all love me and me you too. So thank you.  

Pre-wedding preparation ( losing weight )

Yeay! I have successfully completed my wedding, so I have to give myself a pat on the back for everything. But prior to the day itself, there is just so many many things and details to fine tune, I thought this day would never come. So these series of posts would be a summary of what happened. 

Months before my wedding, I tried (like every bride before me) to lose my weight. And I remembered that my friend ever mentioned that I would look my best at 50kg for my current height and all that so this would be my best chance to test it out. But I didn't want to just lose weight and inevitably my figure so I did some research (namely typing incessantly into Google) and found out about Figurobics!

Figurobics is basically a combination of exercises that targets the key area that most girls want to lose weight on but at same time strengthening your other muscles. For example, burning fats from the thighs and abdomen while strengthening the chest muscle to prevent saggy and loose... wtf!! lol... It is founded by Jung dayeon (click on the hyperlink for more bio on her and her awesome pics at age 45!!) . I basically am a cheapskate when it comes to this because I know I paid for gym membership countless times before and then watch as it expires. And then I bought like stuff that are suppose to help me lose weight and then I forget about it till it expires so for the first few months I did everything the au natural method. 

I googled jung dayeon and her exercises online and actually found her few exercises on youtube!! Cool... So I danced to that few days a week and boy did I sweat!! I actually felt the muscle soreness even though one series of exercise only lasted max 30+ minutes. I was convinced with her technique that I eventually bought one of her book on stretching. Highly recommended!! 

But two months before my wedding, the results were still a bit slow so I decided to combine with yoga and pilates. So I signed up with a nearby fitness group and joined their workout. I woke up real early for some of the classes. Those exercises were awesome!! 

Hehe... I am so dedicated. I'd like to think. :P

Well, the combination of that and perhaps my intolerant stomach, I finally hit my target weight!! (Nights I spent crying in bed because I felt so bloated and nausea from food intolerance that I didn't want to eat yet I am hungry. It was horrible!!) 

Yeay~!

But then days later my hubby came back, and within a short period of 4 days, I had gained 4kg!! (Way more than I initially weight). 

So, basically... 

I finally hit 50kg...

and it's gone~!

O well.... 

The birth of bridezilla

The countdown to my actual wedding day has started and I feel the feeling of 'impossibru' creeping up all around me. Everything and absolutely everything just had to be perfect, which includes me and my cellulite, dark eye circles, butterfly arm and whatever else I choose to freak out about. With the clock ticking more ominous now, I trembled at the possibility of starring in my own version of runaway bride. 

But, take a deep breath and take a step back, I am not too sure why I have this feeling. Technically, we have signed our marriage papers roughly a year ago and I don't recall feeling these jitters when I signed it in front of our family. It was a beautiful moment and I should forever treasure that moment. I do remember the bliss of marrying my best friend in the world, the one and only person I have officially invited to my heart and who have chosen to stay. But before the wedding... suddenly all those thoughts of 'what if's', 'could have' and 'might have' assaulted my brain, add a pinch of my friend's perhaps 'well-intention' reminder of things I should stress about, things I should mind about and troubles and pains I should foresee and that equates to basically the birth of bridezilla. So number one human bridezilla is gonna eat are those who freaks her out now. So that means whoever who comes to me with problems without solutions are gonna have a hard time recovering their hearing ability. 

lol... Anyway...

Let me cover what have been planned and done so far. The first thing to cover will be the pre-wedding photoshoot. If you want to see the pics, have a look here. We decided to go to Taiwan for the wedding photoshoot because we wanted it to be something super special. I initially wanted to go to Japan la, lol... but then we couldn't go in April (which is the time for sakura, I estimate) and one thing led to another, we decided Taiwan. 

The most important thing at this stage is to actually get a really good and reliable photographer. If you choose to make it simpler by going for those photoshoot packages from bridal studio, make sure you check whether they are reliable and delivers on time. My friends have mostly flocked to KL for the pre-wedding photoshoot because it is cheaper but do bear in mind of the difference between time, cost and quality and sometimes spending a little more can really take the burden off the mind especially for people working overseas. 

And I am totally not material for whole body shots because I don't know how to pose (wth am I suppose to do with my hands??), so I was lucky that the photographer was patient and did not make it more awkward for us. 

The best thing is that I get to explore Taiwan during that time and bought a lot of random stuff.... lol... Holiday + work 

So we finally finalized the design and layout of the photo album.... phew... So, now it should be in printing and I should get it pretty soon. 

Apart from pre-wedding photoshoot, one of the most important thing to do is to book the wedding venue!! We did the right thing by booking this venue almost a year in advance. We really like a venue that is big enough to accommodate all our guests but at the same time beside a beach (we really like the beach~!). Then 6 months before our wedding, I had second thoughts about the venue and tried to change the booking but it seemed everywhere else I wanted was booked out. At that moment, I'd imagined the other couple as Kate Hudson in my bride wars. lol.. Since the other venues didn't have the sea view anyway, I decided to fall back on the first choice. And I heard the food there is better too... so woo hoo for me~! Then had to book the emcee for the night. Had another Kate Hudson/Anne Hathaway bridal moment when another couple wanted the same emcee for the night and we lost (We got hold of his number in Feb but we called him in June and the other couple called him in May... we were too slow)... wth... Once again the emcee was so nice, he introduced a different emcee to us and she sounded alright over the phone. Ok, done deal.  

So after the venue, the menu selection and the emcee has been booked... we had to book the band for the night. Hubby loves music, if he had gotten what he had always dreamed of, he would make his groom entrance like a concert with him sitting behind a grand piano and me perhaps floating to him from the ceiling... wth... Good imagination. So lucky that we have a friend who has a mad passion for music, thank you so much~! He'd organized a list of songs for the event, so at least we do  not have to rack our brains too much for that. 

Then came the invitation card designs, it seems like for the past few months Murphy's law has been in full action. Whatever could go wrong will. It really makes me dread the days counting to the wedding. So anyway, a simple card design... a simple simple card design. I don't want to comment la since it has been printed. Later I complain and then karma bit me before the wedding even starts, then soi lo... But maybe I will share the experience after this is over. But anyway, bottom line was even simple was hard. grrr....

Next thing on my head now is wedding cake. Omg... Knowing my obsession, it only makes sense that I turn to jelly when I imagine my wedding cake as JELLY wedding cake!! Omg... so OMG pretty!! And special too! I don't think a lot of people have jelly wedding cakes?!? 

Some more, jelly cakes contains no saturated fats and cholesterol, meaning it will not bulk up your waistline. See, I am so considerate?!? hehe... 

Images from qjelly.com

I teared up when I scrolled through their images cause somehow I felt as if I found my wedding cake equivalent of a soul mate. Like... like I have been waiting so long for you... 

But... but... logistic issues... *tears up again* 

So far, what I learnt through my experience is that planning a wedding is fun but very difficult, especially your own because there is so much more than logistics and planning to it, there is also complicated emotions. Such as the irrational fear of a sucky wedding. There will always be people who tries to freak you out, but take it in your own stride. If they prove too much to handle, then you may scream at them. I think seeing you freak out a bit makes the other person feels calmer, I am not sure exactly the demented logic behind this but it works and they leave you alone. *Happy sigh*  

And I quote my previous tweet, 'If bridezilla does exist, then her mate is Groom-Freak-A-Lot. And together, they will have a freakishly smashing wedding together~!' :) Do I get an Amen on that? lol... Just kidding.